Famous Genitals

Just a quick update on yesterday's post, before I go ahead and try to explain the bizzare title for this evening's post.

There was this well-thought out comment from The Sultan (Centre Court Trading), who said:

Hi Soccerdude, agree with pretty much everything you've said. I think the vast majority of us are curious and want to see how much everyone is making, even though it's probably not the best thing to be doing because it can make us feel inadequate.

I don't think it's any coincidence that those blogs which have shown the most regular P&L profits have been the most popular (Psychoff, Adam Heathcote and Mark Iverson spring to mind). Of course, they also wrote a great deal of interest too, so that helped.

The problem with P&L blogs is that some of them only have the P&L and not a lot else and almost all of them never show a losing day. If you are going to do it regularly, you have to show the bad days too, otherwise you are essentially lying to the reader. I can actually name several blogs that only ever post green screens and I know of at least 3 that are still going which have pretty much nothing to say other than a brief line or two (not gonna mention them here but they do exist). Most of these blogs dissappear after a short time (could be why you don't notice them), I imagine because they are not only boring to read but boring to write.

I always used to post up my bad days aswell as my good days, so it does annoy me when you get P&L blogs that never show losing days. I stopped posting them a while back now because I realised that being focused on monetary amounts is detrimental to me, so I don't even look at my P&L till the end of the month now.

The Sultan's point about P&L blogs that only ever show winning days was also echoed in Dave's blog HERE, where he mentions bloggers who suffer from what can "euphemistically be termed 'memory lapses' (ie. they blog the 'P' but not the 'L' :-))"

I think we must all be in general agreement here on this point. But let's not water it down; this kind of blogging is just bare-faced lying and who likes a liar? The other point about these kind of people is that they must also be trying to kid themselves that they are better than they are, and that's probably the saddest aspect of all.

As mentioned yesterday, for me a P&L doesn't have to be a profitable one to be interesting. Often the opposite is the case, and to watch someone struggling with a bad downturn and to see how they cope with it can often be more revealing and informative than someone who wins all the time.

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Okay, as promised, I'll try and explain my unusual title. It concerns Rob The Builder's entry from a couple of days ago HERE, where he tells of being lucky enough to stumble upon Sugar Ray Leonard at a book signing.

I felt a bit jealous of Rob, for Leonard was one of my heros when I was younger and he was in his hay-day. Leonard really was a superstar in his sport and without doubt one of the greatest boxers we’ve ever seen. His hands were like lightening.

Unfortunately I don’t really have anything to compete with Rob's excellent sighting. I went to the same school as Glen Hoddle, although we weren't there at the same time - and that's about it as far as famous sportsmen or women are concerned.

Moving away from sportsfolk, I can boast that I've seen the genitals of both Richard and David Attenborough at the same time, and I’ve also smelled Robert Maxwell’s shit (before he fell off his yacht).

What? was this some bizarre celebrity homo orgy that I'd attended? Thankfully no. Both of these things happened on separate occasions and in innocuous circumstances. The first occurred when I went to watch a screening of Ghandi at the National Theatre on the South Bank. The movie was introduced by Sir Richard Attenborough himself. As the film was long, there was an interval half-way through, and I duly went to the toilet. Following me in, and positioning themselves either side of me was Dickie and his brother, who were happily chatting across me as if I wasn't even there. Well, I'm embarrassed to say that temptation got the better of me, and I did take a sneaky peek at both of the Attenborough's crown jewels - you know, just to check if they were any different to us mere mortals. The results of said inspection I shall keep to myself, but let's just say it's a shame there were no camera phones in those days.

My "personal" friends, the Attenboroughs

So what of newspaper mogul, Robert Maxwell? Again, completely innocent. I was watching a recording of a Jonathan Ross radio show, which was being broadcast from Ronnie Scott's jazz club in Soho. Guest of honour was Mr. Lard bucket himself, Robert Maxwell. There were a few "satellite" guests on before him to help pad out the show, so I again nipped into the toilet while one of these boring peripherals was busy bigging himself up.

Now please don't think there is a pattern emerging here. I'm not in the habit of hanging around lavatories with the intention of spotting celebrities. It's just the way it happened.

Anyway, when I opened the main door to the toilets, the most inhuman, fetid waft of air immediately assaulted my nostrils, and I almost ran screaming back out the door. This was either the Devil's familiar, or a rat had crawled up someone's arse and died. At that moment, one of the cubicle doors opened and out strode Maxwell, his head held high, brazening out the disgusting reek that hung in the air like death itself. Of course I wanted to rebuke him or swear at him, but to my shame I said nothing.

Right, so you're probably all getting mightily bored now and wondering where all this is leading. This is a football trading blog, for fuck's sake, I hear you shouting. What the hell has this got to do with anything?

Well, you have my wholehearted apology. There isn't any football for me to trade tonight, so unfortunately my little story has absolutely nothing to do with anything.

Whoops. :-)